


Coming between you

by yaboiCelsius



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Blood and Gore, Don't Like Don't Read, F/F, Hanahaki Disease, Language of Flowers, Trans Female Character, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:07:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26911882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yaboiCelsius/pseuds/yaboiCelsius
Summary: Pepper is bi, what am I basing that on? My total conviction that it is true.One day, she meets a really cute girl on the train. Something goes wrong though, and it doesn't take long for a certain disease to crop up.
Relationships: Pepper/female OC
Kudos: 3





	Coming between you

Pepper looks up, and sees herself in the mirror. She is wearing a white dress, with delicate lacing on the arms. It almost looked like a wedding dress, were it not for some details and the length of it. It reaches just above her knees, bruised from kneeling above the toilet. She had originally done her makeup, but after most of it smudged, she decided to go with just mascara and waterproof eyeliner and a deep red lip gloss. Her hair is loose on her shoulders, and it bounces with every movement of her head. Her bathroom is darkened, with the black tiles on the wall having a strong contrast against the white ceiling and furniture. Outside the tiled window above the tub, a full moon is high in the sky between the stars visible due to the lack of light pollution in this area. 

She makes quite a sight indeed. She had debated a boquet with some pretty flowers but it seems too backwards, too...femme? Even then, she thinks the irony might be appreciated by her mum, who always had a flair for the dramatic. A cough wells up in her throat, and a small spatter of blood lands in her hand. So is life, and so has life been for a while now. A feeling of fear settles in her gut, like a brick weighing her down. She has no intention of it happening tonight, but  _ c'est la vie. _ A cold chill runs down her spine, and she sighs. It isn’t cold in the bathroom, yet she feels as if she could be frozen in place anytime. Another cough ripping violently through her throat. She leans on her sink, a small stream of blood dripping from her mouth into her drain. She spits out the remains of the blood, and closes her eyes. Only to think of that day. 

~~~

It hadn’t been that special a day, to be honest it was not going that great. It was raining, absolutely pouring from the sky. Pepper had to take the train to her mum, and got to the main train station on her bike. Her pants were soaked and her hair was dripping on her leather jacket. She had missed her train, and forgotten her journalist notebook to work on the interview she had done. 

All in all, not a great day. 

When the train arrived, it was even more packed than usual, and the only place for Pepper to sit was next to a girl in a Hufflepuff scarf. Resigned to her fate or sitting next to a stranger, she sighed and sat herself down. 

She popped in her earbuds and turned on something that fit her mood. 

_ My feet are aching, and your back is pretty tired _

She stole a glance at the girl next to her. She had pretty eyes, a perfect grey, and her hair cut just above her shoulders. She wore a white denim loose jeans, with a rainbow crop top. 

_ The papers say it’s doomsday. the button has been pressed _

“Your shoe isn’t tied.” 

“I’m sorry, what?” Pepper had obviously shaken the poor girl out of her daydream. 

“I said; your shoe is untied.” Pepper used her left hand to point at the girl’s feet. 

“Oh thank you. I must have forgotten it in the rush this morning.” The girl smiled, and Pepper turned slightly red. 

“So where are you going?” Asked the girl when she finished tying her shoe. 

_ Oh girl, it’s you I lie with. As the atom bombs lock in.  _

“I am going to visit my mother.” Pepper found that she didn’t mind the conversation. 

“Oh, how sweet. I am going to see my girlfriend.” A short pain ran through Pepper’s heart. Why did this girl matter so much already? She didn’t even know her name. 

“That’s nice.” A silence fell. It wasn’t necessarily awkward, just cold. 

“What’s your name?” Pepper found herself breaking the silence. 

“Antoinette, what is yours?” 

“Pepper.” The girl scoffed funnily.

“I wish i had thought of a name like that, but when I came out I just had to go with Antoinette. She is my favourite queen.” At that, Pepper laughed. 

“Well, my full name is Pippin Galadriel Moonchild, so believe me you’re not off that bad.” 

“Oh wow, where did that come from?”

“My mum, mostly.” Antoinette giggled. 

“Nice name, did you mum pick it out for you?” She semi-mocked. 

_ As the world, as the world caves _

~~~

She opens her eyes again. The ceramic is cold against her hands, and her fingertips are soiled with blood, gripping the edge of her sink tightly. Another cough wells up, and she bows her head over the sink to avoid getting her dress ruined. She takes a deep breath, and tears prick behind her eyes, threatening to come out. An emptiness fills her, and there is a dull sadness in her. This is not it, not this way. She needs to be happy. 

She closes her eyes again. 

~~~

A new year, a new chance, a new her. Pepper walked down the stairs of the central station to meet Antoinette. She wore a pretty dress, black with several layers, reaching toward her ankles and with long, mesh sleeves. The station was big, gigantic on some days, when the world seemed too large to fathom, and Pepper felt small. The high ceiling, the rows and rows upon rows of platforms, it was overwhelming. But when she saw Antoinette, none of that mattered anymore. It seemed better. As if her very presence improved wherever she was. She smiled shyly, and took Pepper’s hand unexpectedly. 

“So i wanted to show you this amazing waffle place, they can do whatever you would like!” Antoinette’s eyes shone with excitement, and pepper felt a rush of blood to her cheeks, and a bolt of energy through her arm, coming from the hand Antoinette was holding. 

“When I thought you wouldn’t be here I was so sad. We haven’t seen each other in so long!” Antoinette kept on telling Pepper about what her life had been like the past few months, and while pepper was interested, she paid only half attention, the other half being devoted to the feel of their hands together, and the beautiful eyes and smile of her friend. 

_ I weep and say goodbye love, as my organs pack it in _

~~~

She feels alone, but these memories, they help. Just one more, another one, just to remember. Another cough wells up, this time more heavy and dragging more blood and petals along than the first few. Gerbera petals and lavender mix, it is almost ironic. lavender for Antoinette, gerberas for Pepper, and through the yellow gerberas and violet lavender, red. Red blood and red flowers. poppies, wild roses and red carnation, with red tulips for good measure. There are now several flowers in Pepper’s sink, yet she cannot bring herself to care. She closes her eyes again. 

~~

“So my girlfriend and i are celebrating five years together this weekend! Do you have any ideas for what I can get her?” Besides her common sense, and unreasonable hate towards her crush’s girlfriend, she had agreed to help Antoinette shop. 

“How about some beautiful flowers? You know, you can say a lot with those.” Pepper had some amazing ideas, but all of them seemed too personal, seemed too  _ her _ . 

“Like what?” Antoinette looked questionably. 

“There is a language of flowers, you can use those to make a bouquet that says what you want to say.” Antoinette’s curiosity visibly peaked, Pepper continued. 

“Poppies mean that you are not free, red carnations mean you declare your love, white lilies stand for pure love, and so on and so forth.” She explained, moving her hands and listing the flowers on her fingers. 

“Well i like lavender, what does that stand for?” Lavender would be out of place in a bouquet like that, but it would make it more personal, Pepper considered. 

“Distrust, unfortunately. You might need to settle for something else.” 

Antoinette nodded thoughtfully. 

“So how about pink roses?” 

_ And here it is, our final night alive.  _

~~

Pepper draws a ragged breath, constricted by the flowers and blood welling up in her throat. The world becomes more vague with the second, and it goes by headspinningly quick. She needs water, there has to be a glass somewhere. Her hand feels heavy as she lifts it to find the empty glass. She vaguely spots it behind the tap, and carefully reaches out. Her other hand slips, and the support under her body falls. As does she. She lands on her right arm, and blood spills from her mouth. She tries to lift her head, but there might as well have been a lead bar on it. Her chest constricts, and a coughing fit escapes. Her hands ball into fists, and she draws them closer to her body. She curls up, and swallows the thick mix in the throat down, hoping to prolong her life. Just one more memory couldn’t hurt, right? She needs to go happy. She closes her eyes. Her brain scrambling to find the perfect memory. But it’s too late. 

_ Yes it’s you I welcome death with, as the world caves in, as the world caves in.  _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Me? Writing to deal with the fact I fell for someone unavailable? Changing names and pronouns to be able to publish it? It's more likely than you think.


End file.
